How to Get a Horse to Listen to You

You can watch and listen to this post on Clairety Horsemanship’s Video Theory Lesson channel!

Today we’re talking about the secret to making a horse listen to you, even if your feet won’t reach the stirrups. Hint: You don’t have to try to get big and strong. You can use this trick even if you’re little!

Can’t I ride a pony today? He’s closer to my size, it would be easier. I wish I’d grow faster! The horses won’t do anything for me, I need to get stronger.

I often hear this from little students. And I feel for you, I really do, but those solutions aren’t actually that helpful! Remember, I used to be the little kid with legs that seemed too short to do anything. But no one told me about this…

It’s not strength you need, it’s timing.

The Pin

Let me ask you a question. When you sit on a pin, why do you get off? Answer that poll for me quickly!

If you answered, because it hurts, you’re not alone. Most people answer that way at first. But think of it this way: the pain of sitting on that pin is actually only the motivator for you to try SOMETHING—anything—to make the pain stop! You might wiggle in your seat (oh that hurts more). You might squeal (that didn’t change a thing). And then you try getting up (ah, relief!) The pain isn’t what made you get off. It’s only because it STOPPED hurting when you got off that you knew that was the effective solution.

Horses work the same way. They learn by sequences.

Horses Learn From Sequences

Think of that pin from our last example. In the same way, pressure is one thing that motivates horses. Horses try to avoid pressure like water tries to avoid obstacles. Pressure can include physical pressure like our reins or legs or sounds, but also psychological pressure like uncertainty or confusion. What if the pain from the pin had went away when you screamed? Well that’s what you would do then right? Horses are the same. Whatever removes the pressure is what they will do again. So when you are squeezing and kicking and your horse isn’t going, it isn’t because you aren’t squeezing hard enough. It’s actually because you don’t STOP squeezing when you should! Maybe you stop too early, before the horse did what you asked. Or maybe you stop too late, long after the horse tried, and then gave up.

The secret to getting your horse to listen to you is learning your timing and getting it perfect.

You don’t have to be big and strong. All you need is perfect timing.

Do This to Get Your Horse to Listen to You

• Start with please
• Add motivation
• Say THANK YOU
• …every time.

To improve your timing, follow this sequence every time you ask your horse to do anything. ANYThiNG! From walking with you out of the field, to moving over in the tie stall, to turning a round circle in the arena, to jumping a 4’ oxer. Use this for everything.

Start with please. Use a light, but distinct, pressure cue. Only do as much as you want to have to do every time. If you start with a big kick, you’ll always have to start with a big kick, and no one likes that. Start with the smallest pressure you can that is still distinct so the horse can tell you are wanting something and not just wiggling.

Then, if the horse does not respond right away, add motivation. Motivation can be increasing pressure, but little legs can’t always do that. Increase what you can, but remember that being annoying is motivating too! Just keep at it and don’t give up.

Even though you are concentrating on adding motivation, pay careful close attention to what your horse is doing so you can say thank you at the right time. At first, just look for even a try in the right direction. Maybe your horse won’t move forward at all—you’ll say thank you to him for putting just one foot only one inch forward. To say thank you, immediately drop all pressure, and you can add a nice scratch in an itchy spot or a bit of food too.

Do this every single time you ask for anything. Little by little, your expectations can increase. With the case of that horse that won’t go forward at all, you’ll find after some repetitions of this that he’ll move his one foot one inch forward when you say please! Well done! You’re a horse trainer! Now you’ll increase your expectations and add motivation until you get two steps and immediately give a nice enthusiastic thank you. It won’t be long before you’re trotting all around that arena. Not because you kicked harder, but because you got your timing right.

Assignment

Here’s an assignment for you.

Practice the Listening Sequence. Cue a simple movement—don’t forget to say please! Start with something like backing up a step, or walking forward a step.

Add motivation. Don’t stop asking until he at least tries.

Say thank you! The moment he gives it a try, quit all your cueing and motivation, and add some reward.

Repeat at least three times. Even better, count how many times you need to follow the sequence before your horse responds to your ‘please’! Most horses learn to listen to ‘please’ in the first 7-10 repetitions. Then come back and let me know in the comments how long it took your horse to start listening to you when you said please—all because you started saying thank you!